Is it Pisanthrophobia?

Hello beautiful people,

large

I have been researching on this word from a last couple of days. I came across this from Kavi Akka’s profile. Pisanthrophobia is a term associated with people who have issues with trusting people. After pondering over for good 50 minutes I realised that I have this issue in me. Either I end up trusting people too easily ot I just end up detaching them by not trusting them.

“Every person is not the same Surbhi,” she said.

What happens when people around you are fake? When people around you just know how to hurt you or torment you. When things are never good around you. When people find ways to misuse your thoughts. When people decide to betray you. When you are surrounded with all the negtativity in the world. How can you take a deep breath and relax in this chaos?

superthumb

Either you need to stop trusting people or you can keep on becoming a fool. Canadian lifestyle has one main mantra. Never ever trust anyone. First confirm the things and then go ahead with the information. Nobody will be happy by your success so you should better stop sharing your happiness. It will be a happiness for you but you will end up giving others the chance to hate you. Keep the things to yourself.

Do you know why people fool you and why some others are difficult to be fooled? Sometimes you end up giving a clue to others that you are an easy nut to crack while others turn out to be a mystery to be solved. If you plan your life and never share your stuff with anyone then you are an unpredictable person. Nobody will get to know about your intentions and your life. Hence, nobody can assume about you. But if you treat everyone as your friend and end up sharing things then anyone can predict about your behavior, reactions and many more. So, you better start focussing on your behavior and try to be an unpredicatable person.

Advertisements

Confessions of an Immigrant- 9

It took me 5 months to realise that writing confessions on my blog gives some sort of peace to me. My tired mind gets relaxed while writing it. The past two months have been a roller coaster ride. I hardly knew what the hell was I doing and where I was going. The non stop assignments, tests made me so busy that I didn’t even get a single minute to think like what the hell was I doing with my life.

IMG_20170521_202432

The days in Canadian lifestyle have never been good for an immigrant. At times it is the never ending homesickness, the grief of losing your loved ones, the situations, managing finances, trusting wrong people and to add more, the jobless times. There are times when you feel homeless inspite of living in an apartment. Sometimes you are so alone in your class. You have a company of 39 more classmates still it feels lonely. Only at the time of in class you realise you have classmates as thats the time you talk to them.

FB_IMG_1493872039041

In this one semester I guess I have lived those segments which I have never went through in my past 21 years. I ended up meeting wrong people at wrong time and made mistakes which could have avoided. I won’t say I am sad, upset or depressed. In fact a feeling of aggression hover over mind where I badly want to do soemthing but I can’t. I try to mend the broken pieces of my life but always end up breaking new pieces. Every time the struggles are doubled or tripled. When we were in school we were taught two things, “HELP OTHERS!” ” BE A TRUE FRIEND TO SOMEONE WHO IS IN NEED!” Well, thankyou my dear teachers for these two things but unfortunately in Canada the situation is reverse. Canada goes with three rules, “THINK ABOUT YOURSELF!” “NEVER HELP OTHERS!” “NEVER TRUST OTHERS, NOT EVEN YOUR CLOSED ONES!”

IMG_20170520_102117_889

After going through a major down phase I realised this thing. Sometimes you learn by falling down. But what you learn from that downfall makes you. It is your life and you make the best out of it. The exam phase taught me one thing about teachers. They are generous in giving marks and adjusting the scores. These assignments actually saved us. Even in Canada bad things happen to Teachers. They are misjudged. Here also, our teacher was accused of something which for which she was not at fault. She was hurt and left the college. She performed the duty of a true teacher by conducting the exams. She could have left the job immediately. But she never did. When she hugged me and cried, that was the moment I realised, how dedicated she was. The whole semester she was telling us about the major assignment and she gave us extensions for that. After all that struggle and hardwork we got our grades but what she got? An accusation! I have never seen such a behavior and ached my soul. This incident actually made me respect her even more. Before going she told me, Surbhi, now you have a story to tell to your readers and here I am writing about her. I can only say, I will miss you Mila.

IMG_20170502_203003

Today I was in my most bad spirits when all of sudden out of the blew my friend called me. She knew I was not in a good mood. And to make the mood light she asked me to tell everything what was going on my mind as she has gone through all those things in these 3 years so she can imagine my situation. I felt light after telling her my thoughts and made it lighter by telling her about her situations and how she found a way out. She made me realise that there is a way out to everything. Its just you need to figure them out and sort it in the best possible way. At times you have to put a major cut down on things you want to have and at times you need to sacrifice your sleep to earn something. Hard work pays off. She cited those girly examples which actually cor- related to the things. I felt a bit sorted in my mind while talking to her. So immigrants, if you ever feel in that situation, talk to a friend, listen to a song. For me its talking to a friend who has gone through so much and writing my thoughts out so that I can be at peace.

IMG_20170419_232353_175

Parents are always with you. Sometimes you end up making mistakes but its parents who will listen to you, love you and give you the right direction. Your parents are your family and trust me, nobody will come to rescue you or help you when you will be in need. At times, you can manage on your own but then their are cases where everything can’t be managed on your own. Maybe its best to talk to them and tell them how you feel about them. Since you are away and busy, you can’t tell them how much you care about them, you can’t express your true emotions. At times you need to tell them the best things that has happened to you but back home its night and you have to wait for the morning. Now in morning you are late and you are unable to call them and tell them the news. Then the news become a casual story. And here comes the misunderstandings. Love is on both side but this stupid moron distance and time gap acts like an evil. Same goes with friends and relatives. The best taunts you ever hear is “You have gone so busy or you have forgotten us.” Nobody has ever forgotten you, you will always be there in the heart, its just the time and priorities which have changed.

IMG_20170418_011710

I have cleared my semester1 and now one more to go. Things can be harsh and harsher but you should know that you are a fighter and you have to fight every battle alone and inspire yourself all the time because your parents, friends and relatives will never be there with you all the time. It is you and you only who has to work hard, make them proud and bleed till you succeed.

Confessions of an Immigrant- 8

Hello lovelies,

Its been a while since I updated anything because I was going through major writer’s block. It was a phase when I decided that I would never write but then came some circumstances and situations where I realised I need to vent out my thoughts as it will dance in my head. We all know life is full of ups and downs. There are many things which I came to know during this phase.

IMG_20170719_215929

So, finally I made my bus pass and I could travel anywhere using TTC bus pass. I went to Brampton for a reception of my cousin sister. I learnt one more thing that 102 A stops at Centennial College whereas 102 B stops at Markham Road while 102 D stops just before Progress Campus. I learnt it after taking some wrong buses. Guys trust me, travelling in a bus has been the biggest challenge for me. For two months I avoided bus because I had a phobia that I might get lost but when I boarded the bus, my notions were proved wrong. The system is great here. There is a button to stop the bus when you reach your destination, there is no conductor, you can either put the coins in the box or just use your presto or TTC bus pass. Moreover, TTC pass can be used in TTC subway too. You can get to know about the buses from Transit. So, from Scarborough to Brampton you have to change 5 buses. In Brampton, TTC doesn’t work, infact it is Zum 502 which is faster. But changing buses is not at all hectic. Everything goes in time but you need to be on time for everything else you have to wait for 15 mins or sometimes half an hour maximum.

IMG_20170722_182947

IMG_20170722_202850

Coming to the reception, it was amazing. The theme was white and gold. It was much different than any other wedding in India. It was the amalgamation of Punjabi and Gujarati families which was showcased beautifully. I liked the way the tables were set and the way the families were introduced. And the bridal party was fantastic along with the bride. In India, we don’t have speeches but here there were speeches from the close members of the bride and the groom. They were straight from the heart and reached the soul. Then there was couple dance, father- daughter dance, belly dance and cabre sort of performance. The most beautiful and pure segment was the father daughter dance. It was nostalgic, heart warming and I could feel the essence of love. In India, we don’t have this and I wish at that time I could dance with my dad.

IMG_20170725_084049

A new interesting thing happened in my Canadian life. It was playing the role of an HR Manager and as a Lawyer. No, I am not switching professions, it was part of my assignments. For the first time, I wore western dress and dressed up like a professional. It was an amazing feeling. Plus, during arbitration, it was just like some discussion and I enjoyed this new phase of my life.

IMG_20170720_152311_475

There was an event in college named Rangla Punjab where everyone was dressed up in a suit. The students danced for us, they had small quiz about punjab and many amazing posters were there about Punjabi Culture. Further, they applied Henna on some of the volunteers and I did too. The food was sumptuous as it was none other than Makki KI Roti with Sarson Da Saag along with authentic Lassi. I have a friend named Anjali who performed at this event. I feel so connected to Punjab and on that day I felt at home.

IMG_20170725_114028

Now semester is coming to an end, things have been different here. The people I met 3 months ago are different now. Either they are disconnected and some of them are attached. People are unpredicatable here. Either they will be your closest friends when they need you and then slowly they will alienate you from their lives as if you never existed. The other side is, those who think wont be with you, they will do anything to help you and make you feel special. I came across these two set of people which has made me completely philanthrophobic. I can say people are like chameleon that change its color all the time.

IMG_20170723_022853_421

Canada is a mystery and I am still in process of solving it. I realised today, your parents are your true well wishers and can be your best friends too. I miss everyone back home be it my friends, familia or the friends. These assignments have taken away everything. My inner peace is lost and I don’t even get time to introspect myself. I am around so many people but still I feel so alone and this feeling will never go away. I always feel that something is missing and maybe once I get to know what is missing, I can fill that missed part of the puzzle called LIFE. I just know one thing, I am strong and I know what is being weak.

IMG_20170724_004112_699

I will be back with another new episode soon. Stay tuned and keep following me 🙂

 

Book Review of Bag it All

Bag It All by Nina Lekhi and Suman Chhabria is an autobiographical book that has all the flavours of spiritualism, motivation, entrepreneurship.

DSCN2280.JPG

Sneek Peak:

As told to Suman Chhabria Addepalli with a foreword by Rashmi Bansal – A Bestselling author. The inspirational story of an entrepreneur who built a 100-crore company with the power of intent and love . Indra Nooyi said, “Women can’t have it all!” It’s either career or family. I disagree. As I see it, we can have it all – a successful company, a loving family and the opportunity to follow our passion. When I was a teenager, I started a small ghar-ka-business selling trendy handbags. Today, Baggit is a 100-crore company. Along the way, I became a wife and a mom, and navigated the various twists and turns in my personal life. I could do it all because of my loving, supportive family and my guru, who have made me a better person and a better entrepreneur. This is the story of how a C-minus student – a failure in college – became an A-plus entrepreneur. If I can do it, so can you. My secrets are in these pages.

Review:

IMG-20170319-WA0010

Starting from the first look of the book, I could make out that this book will surely reach my heart. Yes, it did. The cover of the book is fantastic as it has the picture of the owner, Nina Lekhi, of Baggit Brand. Those who are unaware of this Baggit then I would like to tell you that Baggit is a brand name that deals with handmade bags. It has a history of many years and now the turnover has reached upto 100 crores. This book is a story of young Nina who went through thick and thin to make a small shop into such a big brand. Behind all this, lies the support of family members, friends and relatives.Even the contribution of yoga and Guru ji brought Nina’s life on a track.

The book is divided into 3 parts, it has a narration of Nina’s life and then the next part has her struggles along with it, are the lessons she learnt from those struggles and experiences. Honestly speaking, when I started reading this book, I was in my low modes. But after reading it, my mind was fresh and I was ready to take up the challenges. Furthermore, the way the author has used the remarks made by her dear and near ones makes it impeccable.

The book is written in a simple yet lucid way. It is easy to understand and comprehend. Some of the pictures used in the book makes it look beautiful. This book is not an autobiography but a journey of Nina which we can go through by reading this book.

Grab your copies from : Amazon

Bright Mustard Jacket- A New Trend!

Hello lovelies,

I hope you are having a beautiful time and enjoying the Sunday. I am enjoying my Sunday with a Lemon Tea and yes, I am writing this blog for a product review. I recently bought this jacket from an offseason sale. What appealed me was the bright mustard colour and it just looked dazzling on me and my mom. Yeah, we both have same size..BINGo!

16473275_1097509050375369_2331407670533023869_n

About the Product

I bought the jacket from Sportsking showroom. The colour of the jacket is mind blowing and really bright which makes it a new trend for winters. The inner stuff has brownish coloured fur which protects us from cold. The buttons look classy. The best part is, it serves as a raincoat at times of rain. It is washable. Further, it has so many pockets, two in the front and 4 inside the jacket close to the fur. The cap is attached to it. It has a zip, if you don’t want the cap, you can remove it through that zip.

16464739_1756906967970902_2253729194598989824_a

 

The original cost of the jacket is 2800 INR, since I got it at off season so it cost me around 1740 INR. If you want such jackets and at reasonable one then you can wait for the off season as many showrooms and brands organise such sales. Trust me the stuff is really cool.

img-20170206-wa0023

When it comes to drawbacks. The only problem is, you have to be very careful with the jacket as it is a bright colour so when you are in some dusty area then avoid it as it gets dirty very soon. But I feel we are careful for our new clothes. So, from my end, its a must buy jacket.

My ratings: 4.5/5